Disclaimer: The Real Housewives are superstars. It’s fair to say that mathematically it’s just as difficult to become a Real Housewife on BRAVO as it is to play professional sports, if not moreso. For these reasons, my analysis of RHONY and RHOBH will reflect their stature.
Power Rankings Following Episode 5
1. Sonja Morgan 2. Eboni Williams 3. Leah McSweeney 4. Luan de Lesseps 5. Ramona Singer
We pickup where we left off with chaos amongst the housewives and Eboni storming out of Luann’s. Obviously Eboni has a point, Leah called everyone a hoe and Eboni got called angry, talking about education.
It starts with the splintered group, Sonja walking out Eboni with Heather. Heather seems super fake to me, but I will say that a lot of people who have more housewife experience than me seem to respect Heather, so I will withhold my doubt and sass.
Back at Ramona’s upper levels, Eboni has an HQ with Leah to retreat to. Leah immediately understands her friend’s perspective and properly overreacts to emanate sympathy. That’s huge you can’t put a price on that. “I had to flex” lmao Eboni just brings in a perspective that RHONY has never seen which is awesome. “You’re educated but does that make you smart” semi fair counterpoint from Lu. We all know that person with degrees that can’t tell an Avalanche from a Golden Knight.
KURT THE NUDE MODEL IS STILL TAKING THIS ALL IN!!! It’s actually incredible to think that in Kurt’s head he wishes he can go back to when he was naked in front of these women and it was less awkward. What a life Kurt is living!!! (holy shit he is at the head of the table lmao)
Heather seizes on this moment to try and reach-establish her position within the group. You know I don’t like this lol but what Heather is saying overall, is accurate. “Eboni is a better woman than I will ever be.” Say what you want but few on the show keep it as real as Leah. “Luann’s ego comes first.” Even though I still don’t live live-laugh-love her I am admitting Heather into the temporary power rankings. LMAO EBONI IS ALL OF US (skeptical of Heather despite her appropriate messaging)
“Maybe we can break the ice in the kitchen” Ramona finally chimes in. #FunkyFunnyAprons “We have to talk through this. This is not easy easy shit” Veteran shit from Ramona “If I make somebody feel bad I wanna know about it.” Rare shit from Luann–Luann and Eboni realize they need to squash this beef ASAP which is amazing to me. Lmao super queen shit from Eboni. “I hold you in high regard….that was unacceptable.” Bad by Lu. Bad.
Sonja gets reinforcement from Eboni. Amazing movement, could Lu legitimately be on the hot seat? Reminds me of when Andy Bernard squeezed out Dwight Schrute after his Scranton Dunder Mifflin debut. Fuck “ONE NIGHT?!?!? “ “The best apology is to change your behavior.” -Eboni literally dropping nukes Lol these broads basically slept in til like 1030-11am the day after partying. THE LIFE
“She’s dressed…as Leah.” Watch out because Sonja just might be getting her swagger back. “My talent is working out without being tired. It’s effortless. Wtf.” Beauty pageant in the 70s theme lmaolmaolmao Tough experience for Leah. “I’m here for all the costume parties.” -Eboni.
Sonja as a mime I’m dead. Sexual gestures immediately. Now Heather is startinshit about Leah. Here we go this will end in fireworks and it doesn’t need to be July 4th. Lmfao here comes Leaahhhhhhhh Like Eboni didn’t know what she was doing telling her about Heather’s remarks. “I really didn’t know I was doing all that.” -Eboni “Now we’re done. Now we’re FUCKING done.” Lol Leah LITERALLY talking down to Heather it’s incredible. “you don’t even know me” -Heather Lol like that matters. Leah has a point we all need to chill about each other’s political preferences. “You wanna call me a bitch? Are you crazy?!?!”
ANOTHER TO BE CONTINUED Next week: Miss New York Ramona lives working out. This boxing trainer is iconic. Ramona master of manipulation. “Shut the fuck up unless your living it feeling it and breathing it” -Sonja, lmao might be the best quote so far this season WWHL: housewives Superfan is happy that Ramona didn’t remember meeting her. Legitimately.
Power Rankings Following Episode 6
1. Eboni Williams 2. Sonja Morgan 3. Ramona Singer 4. Heather Thomson 5. Leah McSweeney 6. Luann de Lesseps
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